Behavior Equation

Returning from vacation was much harder than I had anticipated. Devin had a very difficult time adjusting back to school. I think the majority of his problem was being so far off of his sleep schedule while we were gone. About a month before vacation (give or take) Devin decided to drop his nap at school. I was okay with this...he was 4.75 at that point and I felt lucky to get a nap out of him for so long, especially considering he was still going to bed early.

Well, take no naps + same bed time then + vacation (Super late bed time + on the go ALL day long + no nap) = one hellava bad boy upon return!

It took us almost a month to get our sweet Devin back! I'm not even joking! He had to go to bed an hour earlier every night for weeks! He is finally catching up on his sleep. He has even starting napping again some days and is back to his regular bedtime. He still goes to bed at an early time, 7:00pm...because he has always been a child who needs a lot of sleep.

As much as we all LOVED vacation....I'm not sure that Erick and I are chomping at the bits to take another big trip anytime soon.

Wild Randomness

*Devin has recently been on the "Wild" side again (of Your Four Year Old: Wild and Wonderful). He has been fresh-mouthed and super-independent minded (seriously kid, you are not 18. Do you not know that?). He has also been acting like a spoiled brat lately. I do not think that is how we treat him. I think we have reasonable expectations for Devin. We have consequences for the freshness and poor choices. Devin has visited 'Time Out' a lot lately. Oye! I just keep reminding myself, "This too shall pass."

*Some things are different around here though. Devin and I are not used to being home all the time. We are not used to being together all the time. And we have been for 6 weeks now. Yes he is going to school one day a week, but otherwise we are together. All. The. Time. Erick, Bless his heart, has been working 6 long days a week to earn extra money while the overtime is there. Thank God for my Mom and Dad. They have kept Devin overnight a couple of times in the past few week-ends. That is a such a nice break.

*Also, recently I have had a headache. Like all day, EVERY day. I had a headache for 5 days, had a 1 day break and now have had it again for 3 days so far. This really puts a damper on things for me and Devin. I know its unfair for me to expect him to be quiet and calm all the time but its also unreasonable to expect me to take him out and about in the hot sun etc with a raging headache. That has been causing a lot of stress between us, unfortunately. I am hoping this headache will break soon (not sure why the meds aren't doing the trick!)

*I have 4 weeks of summer vacation left. 3 days of workshops during that time and hopefully a lot of fun to be had! Let's hope these headaches GO AWAY!

Wild and Wonderful

A couple of weeks ago I was agonizing over the attitude and behaviors I was seeing from Devin (remember my blog posts??). One of the things I did about this was talk to my good friend, Kristen. Kristen is a top-notch Pre-school teacher and has owned her own Pre-school/Learning Center for 15 years (I also worked there for 5 years, so I may be a bit biased). Kristen reminded me that Devin's behaviors are quite normal for a 4 year old boy.

She also recommended that I read the book "Your Four Year Old: Wild and Wonderful" Since this book was published in 1976 (!!!) I was able to find a copy in this HUGE Used Bookstore I went to today. I only paid $1.99 for it (and I bought "Your Five Year Old" since they had that one too!). I started reading the book today and I LOVE IT!! The information/guideline/examples of behaviors is great (and accurate!). If anything, it has helped to reassure me that I am not the only one going through these issues with my 4 year old, and in fact the behaviors are quite normal.

I highly recommend this series of books written by Louise Bates Ames, Ph.D. and Fraces Ilg from the Gesell Institute of Human Development to anyone wondering about the behavioral development that goes along with their child's age.

Karate/Behavior Update

We have had some really nice days with Devin since Tuesday. Each day getting progressively better. By the time we got to Karate on Friday, Devin couldn't wait to see Mr. N.

"I've been a good boy!" he happily told Mr. N.

Hooraaaaayyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Emotions on My Sleeve

I must have had the "PLEASE HELP ME" look on my face today!

Devin and I were the first to arrive to karate class today. As we entered, the owner (Mr. N.) was standing by the door and asked how Devin was doing. "Has Devin been listening at home Mom?" he said, as if I had called him up ahead of time and prepped him for this conversation.

When I said that Devin had not be listening/respectful he asked Devin what was going on. Devin, of course, did not want to answer him. Mr. N. asked us into his office and Devin tried to hide behind me. I did not let him, and neither did Mr. N. A nice conversation followed. Mr. N. spoke to Devin about respect and listening. The same things that I say, but now it was coming from someone who is not Mommy or Daddy.

Mr. N. also has the power to withhold belt promotion. Devin is due to test for a yellow stripe belt for promotion at the end of June. Behavior and respect are just as much a part of this as karate skill.

I knew I would like this karate thing!

It's True What They Say

Terrible Twos
Trying Threes
Effin Fours


Just sayin'.

Four

I was looking up the word "four" and came across this interesting definition:

The phrase "four-letter word" is used to describe most swear words in the English language, as most swear words do indeed possess four letters.

I think that this definition is most appropriate for the age of four. Not that my 4 year old swears, but he sure makes me want to!! I love the age of 4 for so many reasons: ability to reason, understand, and negotiate, can play games like Yahtzee Jr, Chutes and Ladders, etc and be a part of something larger (karate/swim class/pre-school) while asserting his independence and skills. Devin is learning more and more everyday!

The independence also makes me want to scream sometimes! Devin wants to do everything himself, no matter what. Unless he doesn't feel like it. Then he wants Mommy to do it (get him dressed, put on his shoes). He tests and tests- particularly with his mouth. We have heard so much back-talk and "freshness" lately. Such an attitude that I think a teenager lives in our house. Devin tends to think he is the boss!!

Is this normal 4 year old behavior? I have no idea. I tend to think it is...others have told me similar stories about their children. But I do know one thing, the buck stops here Pal! We are not letting Devin get away with any of it. It will only get worse if we don't do something now. Yikes!

Time out here comes Devin!

Treat

Hi! We are still here. I know I have been ignoring my blog the past week or so. I've been getting a lot of headaches again. Boo. And Devin went through a couple days of this 3.75 "fun." He is doing better now.

In light of his better behavior this week, the nice weather, and Mommy's need for a pick-me-up I decided it would be a good day for Devin and I to go on a date. I picked him up from school at 3 and we went out for ice cream.

Here he is enjoying his strawberry ice cream cone with rainbow sprinkles.

And here he is about 5 minutes later.

Nope, the boy doesn't waste ANY time when it comes to ice cream. I wonder where he gets that trait from?

Make-Up

All of the struggles of this extremely difficult week: the tears, the temper tantrums, the timeouts (his and mine on all 3) were erased this morning by one single conversation.

Devin to Mommy: I love you all the time Mommy. I love all the fun stuff, the fun tativities, the playground, going to McDonald's, and chicken nuggets and apples. You're my girl Mommy.

Mommy: Do you love me when we stay home too?

Devin: Yep. I love you matter we do.

Mommy: I love you too Devin. You're my boy.

2%

Good thing I held back that 2%.

The ENT said the ears are clear. (I was in complete shock!) We go back in 6 weeks to check on the tube that's falling out of Devin's right ear. He agreed with me that it came out so quickly because of his rapid growth.

What's causing Devin's obnoxious behavior the past couple of days, you ask? Just being a typical 3 year old boy. That's what my Mom said anyway.